Aquarius: Jeopardy is not just for the 60+ community. Don’t let them get to you. I’d hate to go against you at Molly’s Irish Grille and Sports Pub trivia night and I mean that with my heart.
Pisces: IF YOU ARE LOOKING TO GET LIT THIS WEEKEND GO TO BATH AND BODY WORKS AND SMELL THOSE NEW FALL CANDLES. APPLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE. PUMPKINNNNNNN. LEAFFFFFFFFFF.
Aries: Chamoy pickle. Eat. Excrete. Repeat.
Taurus: This week you will feel inclined to submit an article to the Campus Voices section of The Muhlenberg Weekly. You don’t quite know why. You just do.
Gemini: Congratulations on declaring your computer science minor! Or should I say 10000100010101010101000?
Cancer: I’m sure you can get your therapist to write a note allowing you to have your pet be on campus. Doesn’t hurt to try! They don’t have to know it’s a naked mole-rat.
Leo: Be careful, Spotify Wrapped will stop tracking soon. That 2014 playlist you’ve been secretly listening to is going to end up in your top five.
Virgo: Greta Gerwig got her start on iMovie too. Keep at it! Maybe check out Video Star as well.
Libra: If you run around Victor’s Lament in your Marti costume (I know you have it) at midnight, it may grant you good luck. Who knows, the Muhlenberg Wi-Fi may even start working for you!
Scorpio: Use a dirty word as your Wordle starting word this week. It might get you farther than you think 😉
Sagittarius: Buying freeze dried Skittles off of the Tik Tok shop and reselling them for a higher price IS the way to pay off your student loans. Good idea!
Capricorn: Pose 28 is getting overdone. Switch it up and try out “chic” or “so julia”… or ya know… stop playing Roblox with eight year olds.
The Muhlenberg Weekly's Editorial Board is comprised of the Editor-in-Chief, Managing Editor(s) and Section Editors, one of whom writes the editorial. Material appearing without a byline represents the majority opinion of the Editorial Board.
