Paige’s Page

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Hey besties! Welcome to this week’s edition of Paige’s Page! Thank you so so much to everyone who came to Paige’s Page Live last week, I hope you all had as much fun as I did. It was so amazing to be able to answer questions in-person and unfiltered. If you were not able to be there, I will not lie to you, you did miss the best hour probably ever, but that’s okay because we still have a couple more of these to go. I got some really fantastic questions written to me at Paige’s Page Live that I did not get a chance to answer because we had so many brave people come up to the mic, but thankfully I have this space to answer some of them for you here! So let’s get started!

Hi Paige, my really good friend and I told each other we like each other and it has been three weeks and we haven’t gone on a first date yet and I am not feeling the spark anymore. How do I let him down easy?

Hey bestie! This is really tricky! Falling for a friend can be really amazing because you already have an established relationship and a strong connection with each other. However, it can also make your friendship more difficult because feelings tend to do that. If you have a hard time deciphering platonic and romantic feelings, this can be really confusing and not really knowing what you want can be frustrating for everyone involved. It has been a hot second since you and your friend had that conversation. Since nothing has come of this since then, a conversation is definitely due to happen. It is so cool that you have this person that you can be direct and have open communication with. If you are certain that you don’t feel anything for him anymore then just tell him. Your friendship can continue even if you aren’t together. If you want to try to feel out the possibility of a relationship though, maybe you propose the three-week-late date, go, and be open to whatever you feel. And then reevaluate from there because maybe he isn’t feeling it either but he is afraid to hurt you. Or maybe you both have a lovely time and your feelings reemerge. I honestly don’t think there is a way to let anyone down easily; rejection hurts no matter how big and shiny the bow you put on the box it comes in is. Allow him to tell you what he may need from you following this conversation and actually listen to what he says. If he says he needs a little space, give that to him. If he wants to talk about it, then let him. That will make it all the more easy to protect your friendship. 

Hey Paige! I keep going on dates with my high school ex every time I go home for a break. What do I do?

Hi bestie! You have full control of your actions so if you don’t want to go on dates with them, then perhaps you should not. That being said, I understand the wonder of what could have been, or going back to something that you know works. If the “Evermore” song you have decided you want to relate to is “‘Tis The Damn Season” and not “Tolerate It,” then that is a win, I think. If this remains a fun plot point for you and you are enjoying yourself, then continue. If not, the block button exists for a reason, and you should use it. 

Hey Paige, how long should I wait for someone after they’ve been broken up with to not be the rebound?

Hi bestie, this might sound annoying but if any person wants to think of you as a rebound, they will. You have to be kind of okay with that if you want to pursue this person, or just not care. I personally think that trying to be with a person who just got out of a relationship is not the most fantastic idea unless you are looking for something more casual. People need time to be with themselves after getting out of a relationship. They have to process and learn who they are as a single person. Independence is really hot and sexy, and a really attractive quality in a potential partner. Waiting is hard though so if you don’t want to, I very much understand. I think it also depends on who ended the relationship. If the person you are interested in ended it, then they probably allowed themselves time to heal beforehand and so they are probably more moved on than the person they broke up with. It’s all relative, don’t think too hard about it, you will drive yourself crazy. All of that, I guess, to say, is who cares? Do what you want to do because you want to do it. No one else’s feelings have any impact on the relationships we have with other people. Stop caring about the opinions of people that have nothing better to do with their lives. 

Hi Paige! If I have a crush on campus should I run from it or pursue it? Especially if they are oblivious.

Hey bestie! I think at this point, you know what I’m going to say… tell them, or at least feel it out a little more. If you decide you want to run from it, have fun seeing them for all of eternity because the second you decide you don’t want to see anyone at this school, they show up in the dining hall at the same time as you, walking to the bathroom in Ettinger, in your house, in your car, with your best friend, etc. If they are oblivious, maybe talk to a mutual friend about putting the idea in their head, or use them to gather information about their feelings about you. Also just generally, having a crush is fun even if you have no desire to let them know; creating a harmless little story about someone being in love with you is so entertaining. I love having a crush in one of my classes. It motivates me to say things that I think sound smart so that I can imagine them being like, “wow she’s so fun and smart and cool.” I hope you get married <3.

You can submit questions to https://tinyurl.com/paigespagequestion. It will also be linked in my Instagram bio— @paigeweisburg and in The Muhlenberg Weekly Instagram Linktree.

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